"The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones that never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes 'Awww!'"

-Kerouac

Entries in language (17)

Saturday
Jun092007

Bachelorette of Arts

In seven days I will be a 2007 UCLA graduate.

    Possible summer activities:

  • learn how to translate (waiting to hear if I got in the class)
  • travel to Italy to look at manuscripts in Roman archives (waiting to hear if I got the fellowship)
  • learn ancient Greek (if the other two don't work out)

    Definite summer activities:

  • show Lauren, Katherine, and Jim around LA because they are all coming to visit at the same time!
  • get back into playing tennis
  • learn how to write a book review
  • get my CA real estate license

    Long term goals (within the next ten years):

  • win the New Yorker caption test
  • make lots of money and become really famous
Saturday
Apr212007

Explanation of the Word Attack Dream

In About Me, it says that I like to dream about being attacked by words. The truth is, it terrified me while it was happening, but it was a pretty special occasion. I'll explain:

About two months ago, I lucidly dreamt that I was brushing my teeth while examining yellow stickie notes all around my bathroom mirror. I had written single words like gray, cat, exacerbate, and identify on all of them, and as I was brushing, the words began to address me, one at a time, expressing dissatisfaction with their definitions. They wiggled as they enumerated very convincing complaints about grammar and nuances - gray was very outspoken about nuances. None of the words offered me solutions, so I spit out my toothpaste, stretched out my fingers, wrote their definitions on more stickies, and carelessly switched them all around. Over their murmuring, I asked, "Are you happy now? I've given you new places in the English language!"

There was a long pause as each of the words understood what this meant for them. Then, in unison, they started wailing that I had wronged them, demanding that I return their former definitions. I yelled back, "I can't! You are different everywhere now! In dictionaries, in people's minds, even my own! I can't put you back! We'll never know what you were before!" I started to feel guilty and hopeless, and in their silence the words detached themselves from their stickies, threw themselves up in the air, and began to rain down on me, wetting my skin with ink. I sat down on the toilet seat in despair, watching my pajamas darken, and I wondered what would happen to me in the morning.

Then I woke up.

Maybe the way I keep my desktop had an effect on my subconscious:

kristina_bigdeli_desktop_stickies.png

Friday
Apr202007

Words Don't Fail Us

"Our use of words in which meaning is conveyed by one sound after another, never in a simultaneous present, is for Plotinus, as for Augustine, a symptom of the fallen condition of humanity (5.3.17.24). Nevertheless, 'all things are full of signs' (Plotinus 2.3.7.12). Augustine's fascination with words and his awareness of the difficulty human beings have in communicating their meaning to one another, even when there is no linguistic barrier to cross, made him acutely conscious of a semantic problem. He affirmed the fact that we have to use our words as signs to be a consequence of our fallen estate. All words are inadequate for the expression of divine mysteries."
- Henry Chadwick in his Introduction to Saint Augustine's Confessions

I guess these guys never heard of poetry or rewriting many drafts over a long period of time.

Tuesday
Apr172007

La Lupa in Bucharest

A very pleasant event happened today, and it has restored some of my magical perception of life.

I took my Wheelock's Latin textbook into Easy Nails in Torrance to go over some sentences while I was waiting for Dawn, the nail lady, to finish giving some woman a manicure. When she was done, she sat the woman (Anka) across from me at the UV light stand. I smiled at her. She looked at me and did not smile back. Her lack of enthusiasm reminded me of myself lately. Ever since the Tech massacre, I have had to put real effort into looking happy to see people.

I got up with my Wheelock and went to sit at the nail desk. Soon after, the woman tapped me on the shoulder and asked, "Ekscuze me, may I eksamine yourr Latin tekstbook?" Once I got over the automatic "must be a crazy person" thought that every Los Angeleno has when a stranger addresses him, I pushed the book over to her.

She was really happy to see someone studying Latin because it had helped her to learn English, French, Spanish, German, and Italian. She already knew Russian and Romanian from growing up in Bucharest. She disagrees with a few aspects of the university system, especially since we aren't required to take any geography or history classes. We talked about Rome and ancient cultures and traveling and learning and the Getty Villa and Roman mosaics in Tunis, all while Dawn was polishing away with her head down over my fingers. Anka said that once upon a time, Italy gave Romania a replica of the famous Lupa statue that is on permanent display in the Capitoline Museum, and now the replica is in the middle of a square in Bucharest. When she saw the real one in Rome, it brought back beautiful memories of her homeland.

Here's a picture of it from my 2005 archives:

la lupa museo capitolino 2.jpg

I wish waving at people on the street were a common practice here. You can get so much out of human interaction.

Wednesday
Apr042007

The ASUCLA Bookstore is a dangerous place.

The Young Research Library has any title I could ever invent, organized on dusty shelves in dark corners. But the bookstore has all the best books pared down to what the faculty thinks we should be reading, all lined up in plastic wrapping, by department. So, of course, when I go there at the beginning of every quarter, I do some intense browsing.

I hit the Italian section first, knees bent for Machiavelli, tiptoes for Ariosto (or as Prof. Betti likes to say, l’Arrosto). Then I go to Comparative Literature– they always have way better stuff than the English department. I browse French, Greek, History, Iranian, and Latin, and then I go back to the c’s for Classics. There I always find new editions of stuff I can’t wait to read in the original. I run my fingers over the hardbacks and take time to observe the illustrations on the new paperback editions. Then I check to make sure that Roman Civics is still putting Plautus after Petronius.

A new one caught my eye in Classics this last time. I think it is what their graduate students have to read, and I hope Italian has something similar. It is What the Best College Teachers Do by Ken Bain from NYU. It costs $21.95, and I bought it for two reasons:

  • I'll be teaching college courses next year (!) and I'll need lots of help
  • I wanted to see my judgments about my professors validated

(Wait, does the way we spell judgment bother anyone else?)

Now, after reading all 200 pages in exactly 24 hours, from Monday night to Tuesday night, I am applying the theories from Dr. Bain’s pedagogic study to my own college teachers. It turns out that I don’t have any bad ones this quarter. In fact, they are all probably the best! According to this book, one of the first steps that teachers should take when beginning a course is to extract some kind of contract or agreement from their students so they will actively decide to learn and participate. Today, one of my professors actually used the word agreement in the same context. That woke me up with some serious validation.

More importantly, though, the book taught me how to think about my own mental processes without becoming emotionally affected. It’s neat to be able to objectively observe myself learning. The Socratic method is most effective, and it even works without an ancient Greek geezer standing barefoot in front of me refuting everything I say. All it takes is disproving a micro-reality and fixing it with better information (these are my own words). No togas or Mount Olympus needed.

Here are my last classes before graduation:
  1. Latin 3 – the last grammar class – Charlie Stein and Rob Groves
  2. Italian 116B – Power & Imagination in the Renaissance - Franco Betti
  3. Italian M158 – Women in Italian Culture - Lucia Re
  4. Comp Lit 4AW – Antiquity to Middle Ages - Jeannine Murray-Romàn

Total Side Note: The only time that I ever saw Prof.ssa Adriana Chemello laugh was when I used metonymy incorrectly and pronounced it with a thick American accent. Unfortunately, since that day, my reality has been that I will never be able to learn rhetorical literary terms. Two days ago, I saw the title A Glossary of Literary Terms at the bottom of a handout for CompLit. I don't feel that way anymore.